Here is the baccalaureate address that I gave on May 24 for the Vanguard Class of 2019.
And here is the baccalaureate address that I gave for the Vanguard class of 2016.
MRS. NEWBERRY’S ADULTING TIPS FOR SOON-TO-BE COLLEGE STUDENTS
Adulting. Everyone has to do it eventually. Don’t stick your head in the sand like an ostrich and ignore your responsibilities. Be aware and prepared so you can tackle the obstacles of growing up with confidence like a boss.
OVERVIEW OF SECTIONS
Adulting. Everyone has to do it eventually. Don’t stick your head in the sand like an ostrich and ignore your responsibilities. Be aware and prepared so you can tackle the obstacles of growing up with confidence like a boss.
OVERVIEW OF SECTIONS
Networking and Communication
--Internships and Jobs --Getting to Know Instructors --Speaking up in Class --Academic Writing --Roommates --Snail Mail --Phone Calls --Other Phone Use --Emails --Giving Customer Feedback --Sending Thank You Notes Civic Duty --Voting --Using Your Voice Finances --Cash --Checks --Credit Cards --Saving --Tipping --Social Security Number --Taxes Transportation and Travel --Car Maintenance --Maps --Parking --Booking Tickets --Packing --Overseas Travel |
Health
--Illness --Health Insurance --Emergency Contacts --Medications --Mental Health --Nutrition --Exercise --Sleep Personal Safety --Walking --Designated Drivers --Protecting Your Beverage Domestic Matters --Laundry --Cooking --Shopping --Produce --Food Safety --Recycle and Reuse --Dishes --Floors --Furniture and Home Accessories --Carbon Monoxide --Household chemicals --Utilities --Miscellaneous |
![Picture](/uploads/1/2/0/6/120634145/editor/dog.jpg?1548899920)
NETWORKING AND COMMUNICATION
Internships and Jobs
Getting to Know Instructors
Speaking Up In Class
Academic Writing
Roommates
Snail Mail
Phone Calls
Other Phone Use
Emails
Giving Customer Feedback
CIVIC DUTY
Voting
Using Your Voice
FINANCES
Cash
Checks
Credit Cards
Saving
Tipping
Social Security Number
Taxes
TRANSPORTATION and TRAVEL
Car Maintenance
Maps
Parking
Booking Tickets
Packing
Overseas Travel
HEALTH
Illness
Health Insurance
Emergency Contacts
Medications
Mental Health
Nutrition
Exercise
Sleep
PERSONAL SAFETY
Walking
Designated Drivers
Protecting Your Beverage
DOMESTIC MATTERS
Laundry
Cooking
Shopping
Produce
Food Safety
Recycle and Reuse
Dishes
Floors
Furniture and Home Accessories
Carbon Monoxide
Household Chemicals
Utilities
Miscellaneous
Internships and Jobs
- You may have to apply to lots of them before you find a good one. Don’t get discouraged if it takes a while.
- Have an updated resume ready at all times.
- Network with people in jobs that sound fun to you. Many jobs are found by just knowing the right person.
- Most campuses have career centers that offer resume tips, mock interviews, networking mixes, and good advice. Use them.
Getting to Know Instructors
- Use professor office hours. Colleges advertise their low student-faculty ratios and accessibility of professors. The sad truth, though, is that many students don’t take advantage of the benefits of those opportunities to connect with their instructors.
- You are paying a lot of money for your education. Don’t be intimidated by your teachers. Go and meet them. Just say hello, ask for help, or continue a discussion from class.
- Getting to know professors makes your class work easier, and when you need a letter of recommendation for a job, internship, or graduate program, it pays to have an established relationship with that instructor.
- Professors will also consider the students they know best when they are considering candidates for research opportunities or internships.
Speaking Up In Class
- Don’t be shy. Ask questions. State your opinion. You have just as much a right to be there as anyone, so share.
- Participation lets your professor know that you are engaged in the class, which means that you care. Instructors are much more likely to support students who demonstrate care and interest in their own learning.
- Disagree respectfully. Civil discourse is a key life skill, and college offers a great opportunity to debate and discuss important issues.
Academic Writing
- Default to a formal academic style if you are not sure of the expectations. Write out words instead of using text speak. Avoid contractions, second person, and slang in academic papers.
- Know which citation method your professor prefers (usually MLA for English, Chicago for history, APA for psychology, etc.).
- Know the instructor’s stylist preferences. Some will have you avoid first person, while others will embrace it. Many will remind you to use gender-neutral terms. Some may be sticklers for mechanics, while others care more about self-expression. If you feel comfortable, ask the professor. If not, ask someone who has taken their class.
- Use the tutoring or writing center for help with editing and proofreading, citations, and organizing your ideas.
Roommates
- Establish clear boundaries up front. Be honest ahead of time about how neat or messy you are, whether or not noise bothers you, how you feel about guests in the room, and what you are willing to share.
- Don’t let annoyances fester. Learn how to bring up difficult topics in a non-threatening way. Seek compromise and try to work out differences. Learning to live with others is an important life skill.
Snail Mail
- Know how to craft a handwritten note, put it in an envelope, then address, stamp it and mail it.
- Know how to mail an oversized package or pick up a package from the post office.
- Send a hand-written letter or birthday card occasionally, and not only for older folks who don’t use text or email. Everyone loves to get real mail sometimes.
Phone Calls
- Know how to use a phone to make reservations, appointments, customer service complaints, or general inquiries.
- Be polite. Always say hello and goodbye.
- Don’t talk to other people while you are on the phone with someone, and always pay attention to what someone is saying to you.
- Don’t talk on your cell phone loudly in a public place. Nobody needs to know that much of your business.
Other Phone Use
- Don’t use your phone in class. Not only is a lack of attention rude to your instructor, but you are paying a lot to be in those classes not to absorb what the instructor is presenting. Also, don’t think that you can really listen to a lecture while playing candy crush or watching cat videos.
- Listen to quiet music while studying to tune out background noise. For many of us, that may mean music with no lyrics.
- Don’t be on your phone while out on a date or out with friends. Give people the courtesy of your eye-to-eye attention.
Emails
- Always open and close emails with a quick greeting using an appropriate tone for the relationship and occasion.
- Always respond to important emails so that the sender knows that you received what they sent.
- Unsubscribe (there is usually a link at the bottom) from groups that send frequent emails that you don’t need.
Giving Customer Feedback
- If a business does well, let them know so that they can keep up the good work.
- If a business misses the mark, let them know that, too. For Mrs. Newberry’s tips on making consumer compliments and complaints, check out my tips on the writing page. (https://www.dropbox.com/sh/f6wrdlvbsx4uivd/AACKlDjSig4kElK1ZqDuelvXa?dl=0)
- Sending Thank You Notes
- While feeling grateful is important, showing gratitude is critical. Whether for graduation gifts, letters of recommendation, help with homework, or a dinner invitation, always send some sort of thank you.
- Sometimes a text is enough, but some occasions call for a formal thank you note. See my tips on writing thank you notes on my writing page. (https://www.dropbox.com/sh/d3gl63kk7j9teh9/AACVshqVEvAcdhiZqBX2MD2Fa?dl=0)
CIVIC DUTY
Voting
- Know how to find your polling place and vote or, if you are out-of-state, how to register by vote by mail through an absentee ballot.
- Be informed about the issues in your area. Research candidates and ballot initiatives from multiple news sources to get a balanced perspective. Attend rallies and town hall meetings to learn more.
Using Your Voice
- Know how to contact your congressional representatives, and speak up about issues that matter to you. Remember that they were elected to work for their constituents.
- Exercise your right to free speech, and join others in speaking up for important causes.
- Support charitable organizations and groups that work to advance causes that you believe in, but do your research. Know which groups are vetted and reputable and how much of your donation will go directly toward good work.
FINANCES
Cash
- Know how to get cash from an ATM or from a grocery store cashier using the cash-back feature of a credit or debit card.
- Always carry a little cash for emergencies, but not too much.
- Consider hiding an emergency $100 bill in a safe place in your car or wallet.
Checks
- Know how to write, endorse, and deposit a check.
- Deposit that birthday check from grandma right away. Many banks refuse to cash checks older than six months.
- Know how to balance your checking account using an old school ledger or online tools.
Credit Cards
- Don’t fall for all of the credit card offers that target college students. You don’t really need more than one or two cards. Make sure you don’t have to pay an annual fee, and consider a card that offers cash back on purchases.
- Most importantly, only spend what you can pay off each month. Credit card debt can add up quickly and wreck your credit.
Saving
- Sure, it is tough to save money when you’re already living frugally, but consider putting a little money aside each month for your future in a savings account.
- Your savings should not be what is left over, but a priority that you set each month. Pay yourself just like you would pay any other bill.
- Dip into your savings only in true emergencies.
Tipping
- Know what percentage to tip. These vary from country to country, but generally range from 10 to 20 percent.
- Generally, most service providers can (and often should, depending on the quality of service) be tipped, including barbers, stylists, waiters, bellhops, movers, taxi drivers, and hotel cleaning staff.
Social Security Number
- Memorize your social security number. You will need it often for job applications, medical forms, school registration, and more.
- Be careful with it, though. Make sure it is necessary before you give it out. Identity thieves can do quite a lot with your private information.
Taxes
- Know what forms you need to hold onto, such as W2s, pay stubs, and receipts.
- There are plenty of online resources to help you file taxes, and you can ask a trusted adult for help.
- Many colleges now have personal finance offices to help with taxes and other financial matters.
TRANSPORTATION and TRAVEL
Car Maintenance
- Know where your car manual is kept (usually in the glove box) and how to look up and troubleshoot basic issues.
- Know how to fill your tires with air, pump gas, fix a flat, and change your windshield wipers.
- Consider joining a roadside assistance program through your car dealer or a service like AAA, and then know how to contact them when you need them.
Maps
- Know how to read and follow a map without your GPS.
- Know what an exit looks like, which roads are primary roads, and how to use a map key.
- Know how to read and follow a bus or subway map and time chart.
Parking
- Always park in a safe, well-lit area where you are allowed to park.
- Don’t ever park in a handicapped or tow zone. Leaving a note on your car not to tow it won’t work.
Booking Tickets
- Know how to book a flight or bus trip, check your baggage, and check in at the terminal.
- When booking, look at multiple sites for the cheapest rates.
- Carefully consider the time of day and how many stops you are willing to make on your trip.
- Know which times of the week and year travel is cheapest.
- Check directly with airlines for special deals, and always sign up for frequent flyer miles.
Packing
- Know how to pack a suitcase for a short or long trip.
- Consider bringing clothes that don’t require ironing or dry cleaning and that don’t wrinkle easily.
- Pack comfortable walking shoes, and wrap them in a hotel shower cap so they won’t dirty your clothes.
- Keep dirty clothes in a plastic bag separate from your clean clothes.
- Check the weather for your destination to know what kind of clothes you need.
- Bring a map in case you don’t have internet access.
- Many products can multi-task. Conditioner can work as shave cream. Hotel shampoo can be used to hand-wash clothing items in the sink.
- Always bring a swimsuit and a dressier outfit just in case.
Overseas Travel
- Make sure that someone in your family or friend group knows where you are going to be, including flight and hotel information.
- Learn a few words in language of the country you are visiting. Being able to say hello, please, thanks, and excuse me go a long way toward being a polite visitor.
- Do your research ahead of time. Check out travel books and websites.
- Check the state department website for any travel alerts about natural disasters, terror threats, or other safety issues in areas you are visiting by going to their website: https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/traveladvisories/traveladvisories.html.
HEALTH
Illness
- Know what to eat and drink when you have an upset stomach (ginger ale, peppermint tea, and bland foods like the BRAT diet: Bananas, Rice, Apples, and Toast).
- If you have a sore throat, know how to make tea with lemon and honey.
- Wash your hands often and cough into your elbow.
- Stay away from sick people. And don’t lick doorknobs. ;)
Health Insurance
- Carry your insurance card with you at all times.
- Understand how your copays and deductibles work, and know whether or not you need referrals for certain kinds of office visits.
Emergency Contacts
- Make sure to carry a list of emergency contacts in your wallet as well as on your phone.
- Keep your contacts updated with your employer, school, medical office, etc.
Medications
- Know how to fill your prescriptions by phone or in person.
- Always know how much prescription medication you have. Order refills early enough that you never have to be without your medication.
- Know which over-the-counter medicines don’t mix, and never take meds with alcohol. Ask a pharmacist if you aren’t sure which kinds of pain relievers or other meds you need.
- Only take the lowest dose that you need to help you.
Mental Health
- Find healthy outlets for anger and depression. Write in a journal. Take a run. Talk to a parent or mentor.
- Remember that all college campuses have mental health support. Don’t hesitate to talk to someone if you need to.
- College is not always a laugh a minute like the brochures may suggest. Everyone goes through periods of homesickness, self-doubt, academic struggles, learning to live with new people, depression, and other negative emotions. They are not easy, but you are tough enough to get through them and grow from them. And you don’t ever have to do it alone.
Nutrition
- Don’t fall into the habit of gorging on junk food when you are stressed. Give your body healthy fruits and veggies, whole grains, and lean proteins.
- Remember that while it’s both easier and cheaper to eat unhealthy food (it takes less energy to open a bag of Doritos than to peel an orange), but your body pays the price over time.
- You may not want to be average, but you definitely want to be regular. Eat enough fiber. Seriously. Stress can mess with your system.
Exercise
- You will likely do a lot of walking to classes, but also put aside some time for fun active play.
- A yoga class, hike with outdoor rec, or pick-up game of basketball are all good ways to meet people and support your mental and physical health.
- Most campuses have great gyms. Use them!
Sleep
- While the temptation may be to pull all-nighters, be kind to your body. Lack of sleep has been linked to depression, weight gain, Alzheimer’s risk, stress, and so many other health issues.
- If you fall asleep as soon as your head hits the pillow, it likely means you are not getting enough rest.
- If you can’t sleep, try taking a hot shower or drinking warm milk with a touch of honey in it.
- Napping for 15 to 20 minutes a day is a great way to recharge.
- Watch your energy drink, coffee, maté, and black tea consumption in the evenings since caffeine can keep you from sleeping well.
- Getting more exercise can help you sleep better, but don’t work out right before bed.
- Pay attention to how many hours you sleep when you get to sleep in, and aim to get that much rest on a daily basis. For most of us, that means going to bed earlier since we have early morning jobs and classes.
- If you can’t get through the day without a triple shot espresso or energy drink, you might not be getting enough sleep.
- Put away your electronics an hour before bedtime, and don’t cuddle your phone like a teddy bear.
PERSONAL SAFETY
Walking
- Use the buddy system when walking at night. Most campuses will gladly escort you to your dorm or car when it’s late.
- Know where the emergency call boxes are on campus.
- DO NOT walk with your nose in your phone.
- Pay attention to your surroundings at all times and make eye contact. Look confident, not like an easy target.
- If possible, carry your bag with the strap across your chest and any flap facing you. Make sure that all of your bags are zipped and closed.
- Consider carrying pepper spray and a whistle with you.
Designated Drivers
- If you don’t have one, be one. Don’t assume that you’ll figure out a plan to get home after an evening out. Know for sure that you can get an Uber or taxi.
- Know when the buses and shuttles stop for the night.
- Trust your instincts. If you doubt someone is okay to drive, make other arrangements for both of you.
Protecting Your Beverage
- Never leave your drink unattended, and if you suspect that someone has tampered with your drink, don’t take any chances. You can buy products to test your drink for the presence of date rape drugs here: https://www.drinksafe.com/drink-test-kits/ .
- Soon on the market will also be drug detection straws, nail polish, and other gadgets: https://efficientgov.com/blog/2017/05/22/5-date-rape-drug-detectors/
DOMESTIC MATTERS
Laundry
- Wash dark and brightly colored clothes in cold water. You can wash white or lightly colored clothes in warm or hot water.
- If you mix lights and darks, use cold water.
- Use color-catching sheets to keep colors from bleeding onto each other. Y
- ou rarely need bleach, and if you do, only use it with colors.
- Treat stains with a stain spray as soon as you see them so they don’t set.
- Wash protein stains like blood in cold water so they don’t set.
- Know which kinds of stains can be treated with salt, vinegar, baking soda, rubbing alcohol, a magic eraser, or other method (for a handy chart, go to https://www.cleaninginstitute.org/clean_living/stain_removal_chart.aspx#19).
- Know that wool and cotton shrinks in the dryer.
- Shake out clothing so it is not bunched up when you move it from the washer to the dryer so that it will dry faster.
- Take clothes out of the dryer immediately to avoid wrinkles and so that they won’t sour if they are still damp.
Cooking
- Ramen noodles will get old quickly. Learn simple cooking basics like how to bake a potato, boil an egg, saute an onion, or grill a hotdog.
- Cooking your own food is often healthier and less expensive than eating out.
- Don’t ever put a can directly on a hot stove or try to microwave foil or metal.
- Don’t overcook popcorn in the microwave.
- Don’t sneak in cooking devices that are forbidden in the dorms.
- Spices and herbs like garlic, pepper, paprika, and turmeric help cut down on the amount of salt you need and add flavor to bland foods.
- Don’t rush a good thing. Preheat the oven if the recipe requires it. Foods fry up crispier if the oil has gotten hot enough. And make sure the water is at a full boil before adding the noodles.
- Crock pots and pressure cookers (where they are allowed) are great for busy people. You can cook less expensive meats for hours in a crock pot to make them tender and delicious, and you can make a soup in a pressure cooker in just twenty minutes.
Shopping
- At the deli counter, know what a pound of meat or cheese looks like and how thickly you like it sliced.
- Generics are usually cheaper and of equal quality to name-brand products.
- You can make cheaper cuts of meat tender and delicious by cooking them with a little liquid in a slow cooker or pressure cooker.
- Consider buying often-used items in bulk and sharing with a friend.
- Apps like Retail-Me-Not and Groupon can save you a lot of money on products and services that you were going to buy anyway.
- Bring your own bags to the store and avoid plastic waste.
Produce
- Wash all of your fruits and vegetables with produce spray and/or water before you use them, even if you are cooking with them. Pesticides and bacteria can cover the outside of a watermelon or onion, for example, and a knife simply drags those contaminants inside.
- Go to farmer’s markets to try local items.
- Pretty, perfect-looking produce does not always taste better. In fact, sometimes ugly fruits and veggies taste great.
Food Safety
- When in doubt, throw it out. If it smells funny, looks funny, or just doesn’t seem appealing, don’t take a chance on getting food poisoning.
- Refrigerate unused food right away, especially dairy and meat products.
- Don’t order or buy more food than you know you will eat. Consider ordering half portions where it is allowed or split a meal with a friend to avoid waste.
Recycle and Reuse
- Jars and lidded plastic containers are great for storing leftovers.
- Rinse food from plastic, glass, and metal before recycling.
- Know what can’t be recycled (like greasy pizza boxes, plastic wrap, and straws) and put those items in the trash.
- Consider composting whenever possible. Worm composting in plastic containers is easy indoors and much more fun than it sounds.
Dishes
- Wash dishes right away so that food doesn’t set.
- Use liquid dish soap for hand washing and machine dish detergent for machine washing.
- Know what can’t go in the dishwasher (like flimsy plastics or gold-rimmed glassware) and what works only on the top rack (many water bottles).
Floors
- Know how to sweep up piles of dirt with a broom without spreading dust everywhere. Mop only after fully vacuuming or sweeping floors.
- Adjust vacuum for different carpet lengths.
- Know how to empty a vacuum and change a broken belt.
Furniture and Home Accessories
- Use coasters and trivets on furniture. Putting something hot or wet on most surfaces can cause irreversible damage.
- Cinder blocks and boards can substitute for shelves and milk crates are great for storage.
- Folding tables and chairs are great for gatherings.
- Know what kinds of light bulbs and batteries you need, how to conserve them, and how to change them.
Carbon Monoxide
- NEVER sit in an un-ventilated, closed garage with the a car running. You could literally die.
- Make sure your living space has a carbon monoxide detector.
Household Chemicals
- Never mix bleach and ammonia. In fact, never mix any cleaning products. You never know what dangerous fumes could be produced.
- When possible, use nontoxic products like vinegar or baking soda for cleaning.
- Only rarely use harsh chemicals like bleach, since they tend to wear down surfaces and can cause staining.
Utilities
- If you live off campus, you may have to pay for your own electricity, heat, air conditioning, water, cable, etc. These can be expensive, so conserve resources and plan ahead.
- Wear a sweater and socks instead of bumping the heat up.
- Use fans instead of turning down the AC.
- Don’t leave the lights or TV on.
- Budget for these expenses each month, and communicate with your roommates about sharing the responsibilities of paying up and conserving.
Miscellaneous
- Know how to tie a tie. Ask your father, uncle, grandfather, or family friend for help. If that doesn’t work, go to YouTube.
- Warm coconut oil makes a great hair treatment. Just be sure to wash it out thoroughly so your hair doesn’t look greasy.